Dr Rob 8-11-17

Friday, August 11th

00:26:35

Transcript - Not for consumer use. Robot overlords only. Will not be accurate.

Back to the rub any money you don't show on 98 rock lines paging our guests who got the nets who. Wore. Yeah I. You're listening. My name is dawn mission. Call Broderick yeah. You need now. Listen online and and radio I. Zero RED Iran radio dot com on the same main commercial restaurant and only pay county says insurgents are noisier. And she's aware yeah. There's my little sisters area's 32 murder. OK see you there. How old Emily. And I know she inner maggots in training or listening right now and they would love to hear the birthday song if you give her shout out it would make her day okay this is from penny saved penny he saw. Mike and Mike this is you work he's turning 65 tomorrow OK okay and why is only 48. Since corrections in the madam and would you please please please with Mike happy birthday from Chad Henne and I have no. And then there's this that says good morning anybody I was hoping to get them birthday shout out from my aunt candy. Pushing dancing nice. It remains. Today I don't know I told us he turns 45 tomorrow we'll. They hit a nasty. The death that you don't know that and got. It's dusty they looked on your show well over ten years to go I always forget to do something for her birthday so I'm hoping that a shot up. Really good job we'll make up for an old yeah yeah now. Happy birthday. People now. Still have aftershocks to hit. Given where this room. And common problem here on our phone number. 8889891911. You can always breaks the doctor art AD at Brad radio dot com I'm not really doctors Osaka. Is from name was healthy persons he writes recently my wife came to me and brought up having kids so we've been married five years. And we are both 23 years old. Oh Jesus a sensory team. I always wanted to have kids before but over time I have lost complete faith in society I'm not sure wanna bring your child into this world today. So am I wrong to feel this way or should I just get over my fears and holds strong to how I feel and not have kids. I know this is an issue that ruins relationships but I love my wife and I have no intentions of a split enough nor do I want to pass the entire letter. You're not wrong to feel sorry you feel sir you're entitled to every feel and one of the things that people. Totally misrepresent when it comes relationships is guess what happens to people over time. There they change goodness so you will need to decide. If you really feel this way and you also need to understand. Whether or not you misrepresented yourself. When you were eighteen months or whether you have legitimately changed because those are two completely different thing is if you really thought you want to have kids and you told her that. And now you tell her not so sure you have to be ready for her very legitimate emotional reaction wait a minute this is what I signed up for. And then you have to have the courage of your convictions is a earth you're right. It's not you sign up for. But I don't wanna now what does that tell you about the kind of father are going to be and yes this does and relationships if you're both blocked Dan. And your on different levels and different sides and different planes but this is where you first letter writer need to do some serious soul searching. Do you just have cold feet. Are you just look at first uses is it just not the right time. Or do you really. Not want children. Now you're still young you're only 23 seed and bring all this up with her and C can do it in a very comfortable nice way. And see how she reacts to this because maybe. And then she see because speech he puts us back in her court. If you stayed where is your dream legitimate injury you know if you go through all of the thoughts that I just gave you and say no rob I really right now. I can every kid in this world for whatever reason trumped the economy people sock I just can't do and I would be a horrible father. Then she gets to make the decision well do I wanna spend five more years of my life would this man who may not change that decision in five years. That's not an ultimatum that's not putting her position but that's why you have to be certain and here's the one thing that scares me about your email when you allude to. Just get over it. Just got over and give her a kid that is a recipe for a failed relationship when he failed father if you have not done. The soul searching because too many men in particular go down that road. And they hate their kids they hate their wife they hate their lives and their terrible fathers because they hate themselves. For the decisions they made this a serious issue you can't just blow this off. Final moderator I don't want you to think that it's wrong or whatever actually means to meet your being. Carrying and thoughtful about the kids you don't even have yet because you're thinking of all week. What is their future gonna look like fifty years down the road firm right now I do doubt all the time. I mean I know that I wanted kids I always wanted to be a mom and I had with somebody that. I got juice and I got three kids hey you know I I even just yesterday I think I mentioned on the air. If something happens then we go to moral war three. My oldest is two years away from being eighteen more what do they bring back the draft those are things that I'm thinking about. You know and it just to see it is important to think about what it actually means to be bringing a child in this world so I commend you. Four actually sitting down and putting sucks they thought into it. You may change your mind and realize OK maybe I'm not gonna live my life in fear and actually do wanna be a father and that's crazy come to that conclusion. But the fact that you're being thoughtful about their future shows a lot of your care. Her and I am wondering if your wife is as well because I know with girls not all it was a lie I am we've all of our. There there I come from the same route around the same time as Amanda eleven years different where it all we just we want kids right you have kids it's would you do. Right you act and Anatoly. Did everyone really thinks that thrills alike is she getting caught up in she always wanted to show was thought you guys and kids are her friends starting to have kids. You are the parents asking when you're gonna have kids has been I guess is she getting caught up in the fantasy. Or does she really line. To have kids this dirt that ugly the dirty the treaty all of it or is she like. Fantasizing. How she's always visualize it and I I mean for these conversations that does it would be. I am equally as selfish of her and you know I had ever want because now there's a kid years they didn't ask to be here. Read it that kids are asked to be here we bring them here we decide we're going to you and it. I ear just it's a thing of beauty and does your age. You know you might you might change your mind and a couple of years you know as you might never and it's okay if you don't wanna be endowed by the way but you mentioned. I really can't say you wanted to be a dad so much easier on every kid in this world. Any maybe find out if you wanna be a father but you don't wanna bring a kid into this world visit Syria and is already mad world there's kids that are here already. That need a father they need some of the Foster them or adopt them and eighty have a heart for maybe you don't but it's kind of like. Dina pairing. Means you wanna be a parent regardless of the U popping out or are parenting someone else's child that couldn't. So my question to him Ers are you in a letter to that same day. She wanted kids just like in general learned what she's saying hi I want kids now leg and I know he's used 23 so did she say that she wanted to know also does that hit my wife came to me and brought up having kids so I had that I gather that maybe she's just starting the conversation I don't know that's a good question is he demanding an orgy just sand. Hey you're gonna start a family. And I'm not jerk around one thing I do want is an overarching thing within relations in general is a lot of people feel obligated because of things that they said in the beginning. Like maybe they said yeah I wanna have kids someday maybe it's time and they do with kids maybe it's a geographical challenge you know what I really wanna live in such and such a place Sunday and then. Somebody calls you wanted and you feel like oh yeah well I mean I I sent I would do that. It's doing that five years down the road ten years down the road means you would be unhappy. Then you don't just look totally ruins and would do women have uber but he beat that's just not how success works so low they're a phone numbers alienate. 9899 in eleven hi Ron. Hey guys thanks okay on this guy here. If he's afraid of bringing a child into the world because of what the world is producing right now on water where we're at. He should think about. How he's gonna raise that child if she did she. Truly wants to have a child he wants to raise their child may be his child is the person that's gonna make a difference. In how old this society is gonna be run at his age. He should he should I look I I I honestly agree with you he should evaluate all of that all he said was. I am lost complete faith in society. And we have to do what what the letter writer asked to do is show what does that mean isn't just an old whoa is me in the world is awful thing I really do wanna be a dad isn't more the way I look at it. Which is in May reaction Iran's call I would never be able to raise my kids the way I wanted to because society sucks so bad nominal one of them jail. And I don't wanna go down that road sort of thing and he needs the way down. Those things that's what he really me. I don't know. You've been consistent in the real reason you don't wanna have children you like your lifestyle to match you don't wanna change it sure is not has this world. It is yes you do think of the after effects of that happened that you have to deal with parents but that's true go away. Parents have always had to deal with other parents right now I'm not here right how are not just parents and society telling is that you know what the what I hear someone say. I want every person in this crazy world which we can do that sustained type seat our perspective is it's crazy if they thought I was crazy during World War II as well. You know I mean there's been times in our world awareness seems crazy to that generation and all my god this world is going mad how can every child in July right. If I keyed into me. I would rather. Not but it's up to me and I'd rather hear and their reasons I just wolf I would just rather fathered kids it's already here I don't wanna bring one. It again I always I had was I lost faith in society we don't know what that means gas does that mean it's a mad mad world. Or does it mean and there's other definitions of it doesn't mean I can't reason G in this society because society sucks. Elements that. I'm not fostering or adopting anything either ask the same reputations of dealing with all the political correctness all through your abusing your kid ball and that's right key that's certainly does give them things and think about half. Cheney's early figured out it isn't just because he's one threes got cold feet he might you know I. And if she can only give you two more years well then she gives you two more years and then you guys sit down again and you say. You know I'm actually ready I'm soften or you say I am more certain than ever that I don't want them and maybe she says me too I'm so glad you didn't knock me out. He says it will feel bad that I need kid's arm and go find somebody. Students for every story you'll hear. Other man who didn't want them and have them and fell in love and it was the greatest best thing he ever did. There is any cool story of the guy who went ahead and did it and hated every moment and it it was a. Airbus father next emails from please don't use my main paper says says she says I recently found out my boyfriend of one year has been lying. About his divorce from her. When we first started dating he told me that they filed in 2015 why just recently found out he actually final three weeks ago. In his defense we lived together for almost the entire year we've been dating. I don't know how that's a defense. I guess I guess in other words they've they've lived together the whole time they're dating and so is our lists the entire desk I've talked to her OK she's she's she's talked to the X. About this and her stories as far as when they stop living together and when they stop sleeping together check out. If it was any other person I would have Bolton already. However we lived together and helping to raise his six year old son I've been part of this little dues lifelong have to be attached to him and not want to be without him and I love this man. And his many person should be. I've never had such a what I thought was a genuine relationship with someone who I get along with sorrow wealth. We've talked about having a child maroni getting married but I am so lost and I don't know what to do. I don't wanna leave the little family I've created but no one deserves to be lied to like this or for this long please help OK. Why did he lie to you. Unfortunately the doctor rob saying and often turns in the same thing over and over again communication. You didn't mention I read your entire letter Y Eli you. There was he'd and you asked him why he lied you how did you find out that he just filed three weeks ago why did he just file three weeks ago. Boise embarrassed was he hiding something was he ashamed what was. Lazy lazy lazy which is very bad very big deal on the horses because I know. Is separate but I did and I knew a couple of friends and I don't even know they're divorced now. And then legally separated for four years laugh and have. Never filed for divorce and they had gone off they had done multiple relations of these other I ran into my buddy my guy that's all I don't know I'm judges never biology of violating. All. I want to ask you why did he now why did you lied you. Back in twenty or tell you that they file and Tony fifteen an eighty minute doesn't lie or did he mean and as well yes things are moving front and there's things a look at here before you break up this family. And you're just not given me enough and enough information if you're satisfied with the answers. This is a big god damn thing the lie about Jack I mean. Honesty I I don't hey general you can have a relationship without honesty but. Is this I. I'm lyzard terrible however. Is this the only lie you've caught him brightly. You'll find him to be a very honest person he's always been up front with you you've never economy and a lie before it and it that the. Right you know I can in my and a garbage I just I feel I'm so Terex. I hate lines so much. I don't want to put my beliefs on yield I mean you've got to go with your guy. Do you feel that there's more to this isn't just some highs do you once you start thinking about their and other things they'd like to me about she is hard to trust other things. When you thought they are being truthful with other things do you guys being truthful with this. Steve is well I case is so important though what's the motivation of the lies sometimes there's a legitimate motivation is still might not agree with that IOK it was sweet not you know malicious and the underwriters say this is an open line of communication with. RC XY and she just ask her hi while wide and she kind of probes that. If she's so afraid of tough talk and soar so has zeroed out from the under the age of out of from the X that everything lines up in terms of when they stop living together and when they stop sleeping together so. Or what why the filing delay say it sounds like estimate or lazy right. Yeah and so. Did I never been married and shocker I don't know anything really. Divorce but I do have a little bit of familiarity with the RX child support cases and child custody. And I know with Jack you. Can't file to get a case number and then once you have your case number you have to follow through with all the rest of the paperwork so is that similar and of course where. You can is that you can you can you can and so in the wayward California anyways is you you file for legal separation. And then you can just sit there and you that you separated so. Someone files for divorce it's just you're just legally set I'm wondering if that's what they did and then just never followed through with us. Paperwork because it's a pain in the ass is expensive yadier idiotic as both of those things and on the question would go back to why did you lie about it. Let me eat hit maybe he didn't mean July maybe is like oh yeah we did file but these teams separate nationally. It could be as simple as getting hard you know what some guys. He might have known early on what equality woman he had and some women. Right there they're not gonna move then there could do nothing and they want and told relief done right in there they're going to be spending is scared off by the fact that. You're still technically an area only and he's added so now that goes back to the motivation when I was making earlier now look at still alive but that's a sweet motivation yes. That's sort of turning up the motivation and they're bright lights yeah you know him is he vindictive person to meet you know whether it's character flaws or somebody when you're with them. Don't work and one more parents from. Name withheld dude paid dues as dear doctor rob I was in a four year relationship there restored my faith in humanity so all I found my best friend my confidant after two unsuccessful marriages in the past someone I was going to spend the rest of my life whistle. Whenever fought in other than a few minor disagreements we never exchanged words and we can talk about everything. Or so I thought. I'm back in December high school friend of hers spree connected with her after eighteen years away. Yes this was her high school crush yes it was the one that got away from our. Really she was very open and my guys and we talked about everything so they decided to meet up in February. And he was bringing his wife to the meeting and she politely asked me not to come because. She was in the process of going to self help classes and therapy for being shy and she says she won the freedom to try it on her own. I said okay. But the morning of the meeting with her friend and she called to tell me that we are breaking up. Out of nowhere because she needed some space terms she's so later that day she blocked everyone in my family and all my friends on FaceBook in two weeks later she's married to the guy there never was wife. And all we got imports saying teen south Warren all of that is just back jobs it has nothing new employees writing. Wow he says now. Where any help. So that people wouldn't call her remains. She decided to start spreading the story that for the last four years I had raped her. The sexually abused her. Oh and emotionally violated her for the entirety of our four year relations. My girly guy and she is telling this to anyone that will stop and listen to her or. I had been blowing in off as everyone knows me knows I would never and have never done any such thing but recently she tried yelling that Mike and about it. And even cornered my daughter at the thought. Couple weeks. Man. Now all right guys that I didn't know that slander was something available as a means for every day working Americans until your show. Do I have grounds to go after her. And where Roy even start whilst I was going to letting go. Even though it has caused problems with some acquaintances I didn't care to keep his friends if they would believe the story in the first place but now. She is trying to tell the same thing in my family members and even my children cheeses oh hell no bad she is going too far and I don't know what to do. Yes you are you absolutely have grounds to go. After her slander and libel have different levels improve ability and there's a miss out there just so you understand what you're gonna have. Did you serve as a myth out there that you can't slander a public figure like say me it's actually the exact opposite. When your public figure they actually has built his fortune or Spain based on his reputation it's actually very easy to slander me. Because if you go out you say something about me than in any way would make. My sponsors my coworkers my employees my partners. I question my ability my validity as a human being boom you're done and the story. You have to be able to prove damages. And it doesn't have to be financial damages and it sounds like this is an easy lift it to this extent. When you say she's been saying this. How is she saying it. Is the only sane into other people and if she is are they willing to testify on your behalf are they willing to go for come forward and say. Person after person after person a person says yes she said to me this add this to me orally that slander. Did she do any of that writing which becomes libel slash slander and then she's really done an and the next thing you have to prove is that she knew it wasn't true. And the burden of proof is interest in and slander cases because. On one level you need to prove that she knew what she was saying wasn't true but on the other hand she's gonna have to produce any evidence. As to how you were reaping her sexually abusing her etc. etc. Cards it's going to be a fairly ugly lists. But you. Absolutely. Yeah here's what I would suggest this this summer's gonna wind up in the courtroom like on law and order SV you if you do wisely. You'll allow this to go on and I understand why you didn't even understand he had any recourse to us. You've allowed yourself to be completely destroyed in terms of your image even though a lot of people believe that for a long it's gone on. Now all you have to come back and you have to figure out awaited seller this must stop and here is what will happen if it doesn't and also you weren't where the where your opening is the fact is you approach your kid she is one thing wrong to be telling other adults. That you know you and I am taking you or your worst course. The human brain terror and abuse your all these ways. That's malicious that is slander that is wrong is it is something where you must threaten the other person and tell them you will not used to me anymore. It's a whole another level once she approaches your own shot or else she's this. And tells or doesn't matter there's a public place tells her that her own father is a bad man you start with an attorney. I'm sorry but it's not going to be cheap you can't I mean look you can try to do on your own I don't and a person like hers gonna respond to look at this human being you were together for years disgusting person she dumped you for high school sweetheart and marry him. Two weeks later god I don't know that she's gonna respond to a note from you. A sternly worded letter. She might respond from a sternly worded letter from an attorney who says if you don't cease and desist here's what we're gonna do next. That's recall somebody like Kevin here we my guy from new laws. Or whoever you know there I don't even know if Kevin won't get involved in the case like this thing is you have to find an attorney. Because you need the power of something more than your words if she doesn't respect you at all. Based on what she's saying about you. Is there anyway that comes as saying he does get an attorney for us. Is there a way that that attorney can get her to do something for her and she SE a polygraph tests and then maybe even he would tune kind of I see you what does two stories aren't or is that even possible. It's possible the question becomes if we take him and his word. Why would he want that what he wants he wants two things he wants to stop and if he's Smart he wants a public apology both are the only two things he wants if he's Smart. Don't go after money is no point in going after money you wanna threaten her though in some way in this where the attorney comes in comes into play. That says if you don't do this here's what we're going to do wish I would suggest is probably a the ability to report urged the authorities for confronting the child. There's other ways you can threaten either so many threats you can make an you have to have the power somebody that knows what they're talking about doing not some jerk on the radio but an actual turning. Who can tell you what these things are and set your sign on those goals. First cease and assists second make it publicly aware these things never happen now is to that point to Christen points if she refuses that. Then if his attorney believes him rock's stock rock's stock narrower. Fraser's lock stock and barrel and as they. Well then yeah. Yeah do you okay fine man you're existing my client did this would you submit to a polygraph test you can't force surgeon who. But if she says hell yes now you know then you go down that road and hopefully it works out okay we don't have some pathological bumpers and writing. So I met. If you're a lawyer legacy isn't their lawyer he doesn't handle it sometimes people are light how do you find the lord because. He is sabotaging their friends and have lawyers here I'm here because most people don't walk around meeting the lawyer I meant and I wish I was 10 yeah you're right. Old soda tells somebody a lawyer a lot of times are like oh my god how old and and I'll just give you little insight only had to get a lawyer from way before my mom's represent her. I she lives in Arizona and obviously Ron's lawyers could not help me so old I like how the hell am I gonna find a lawyer and a town we don't know anyone who no one knows or what ever. Honestly not again I called businesses that I saw where around for a very long time. You know at some point they're gonna have to of these lawyers in the town I'll say yeah. So I called a few of those wrote down the names that they suggested and I also called to account those offices because they always know lawyers. And they recommended and it just so happened that within those recommendations there was one guy that was always mentioned and so that could be a good place due to start I had to get recommendation. Where there's a will there's a way I should not continue to take. The doctor any time Ari dear red radio dot com and it's time to play the pressure cooker our daily trivia game question we played every single day although we don't get a winner every single day Strauss tribute people who gathered no what are you don't. Five ray at thirty seconds to get a pair of tickets. To see the aftershocks festival day one of two on Saturday October 21 discovery bargain Sacramento California. They want includes Nine Inch Nails perfect circle stone sour Eagles of death metal and so many more none of this matters less your caller eighteen right now here. Our phone numbers told free from everywhere at 888. 999811. Caller eighteen plays the.
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